I settled for another half-hearted wave and turned away, to see Dad standing much closer than the action than I thought he was. My eye twitched, and I considered doing something rude. As I waved good-bye (forever, I hope), he blew a kiss. After a couple futile attempts to get back into the middle of the swimming area, and a few mouthfuls of sea water (it was very very salty, and I thought I was going to throw up), Mom did her waving thing again, and this time it was actually time to go. That’s me, always thinking of other people’s safety… Thankfully, the wave settled down just as another came up and I was swept away from him and his probably lecherous grip. I refrained from killing him violently (I have a katana that fits in my bikini, you know), for fear that the blood in the water would attract sharks. Much farther up than they should have been ( Ach-med, Oct-opus, not very much of a difference. I’m not sure if this was an accident, but I think it probably wasn’t: under the pretext of trying to get back on his feet, I felt his hands wrap around my shin and climb up. We both went under and were being carried around by the waves. Then, conveeeeeeeniently, a large wave came rushing up. * Dad, please get the shotgun…and shark repellent.* A little creepy.īack in the water, he again came up to me and started up some other conversation. Me: *thinking* No, really? *to Mom* I know. RM: That guy (meaning Achmed) in the black shirt likes you. Mom simply said to watch where I was swimming, because the waves had carried me about 10 or 15 yards away from where I had originally started. He said something else, but I couldn’t understand what it was, so I just shrugged and went back to Mom. *to him* No, sorry, I don’t have a cell phone (ah, the all-too-convenient truth). Call it, it’s a hilarious recording to listen to). Me: *thinking* Oh yeah, it’s 61 (which is actually the rejection hotline number. I surmised that she wanted me to go back to shore, so, thinking that it was time to go, I said good-bye to Achmed. I lost track of where I was floating, and when I looked back to where Mom was standing and holding my towel, I saw she was waving her arms dramatically in some ancient form of communication. My first thought was, Achmed? As in, the terrorist? As in, the Dead Terrorist? Then he said, “You look very beautiful.” Then my thought process changed to, Okay, a little creepy, what kind of person randomly says stuff like that? Maybe this is what passes for small talk in Pakistan. But I just smiled and said thank you and that was that. He said his name was Achmed, and he was from Pakistan. It’s kind of hard to explain, and not really relevant to the story, so I’ll just shut up about that and move on.ĪNYway, as we were moving with the waves, this same guy asked me where I was from, what my name was, and where I was going. It was fun to jump just as the crest of the wave comes up to you and then slide down the other side of it. Finally I got to the point where the waves were swelling, but not actually breaking. I managed to make my way past the waves that were trying desperately to push me back. I went back to retrieve my towel to wipe my face off, and he beckoned me farther out to sea (we were in a set swimming area, so you couldn’t go out past a half-mile). I waded in a little deeper, letting bigger waves hit me, until 15 minutes later he noticed me again, just as a large wave came up and smacked me in the face. I probably shouldn’t have encouraged him by saying that, though. He apologized, I asked him if he was okay, yadda yadda. The man was in his late-thirties and had long-ish hair, with a bald spot. I saw it coming, but couldn’t exactly move out of the way, considering the water that was swirling up around my shins. I was wading, picking up nice rocks, when one of these wave-divers was swept towards me and managed to stop by hitting my legs. Not that they were very far out anyway, probably just 15 feet into the water. This usually ended up with them being tossed about in the water and washing up a few yards (meters) away closer to shore. There were some people in the water who were waiting until a wave was curling in on itself, and then diving headfirst into the wave. However, I had an… interesting experience, shall we say. I am one with the– WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?! The water was warm, surprisingly enough, and the waves were… happy.